What I learned from The Notebook

I finally watched the oh so famous movie The Notebook during my 8-hour flight from London.  So, I am not sure if I went into the movie knowing I would be emotional or if the movie was simply a tear jerker of a relationship that I could only dream of. I burst into tears when I actually realized that the woman he was reading to was her. He moved back into the nursing home to be with her. Wow!! I actually hid my face when I realized this because I could not stop crying. I really spent the majority of the movie in tears. Is that weird?  No idea.  I will just blame it on the moisturizing cream that I had on my face due to my skin drying out on the flight.  “Okay, let me stop being silly and get to it. So where do I start. There were so many gems in this movie but I will only hit a few that stood out significantly.  

Taking a Chance on the Fantasy

It’s okay to take a chance on love especially that fantasy love.  You determine your own fantasy and what that should look like. Often times circumstances force us in another direction and we spend the rest of our lives wondering “what could have been.” Our circumstances are often times an easy way out. It suppresses what we really desire. Following our heart forces vulnerability and provides a chance even if that chance doesn’t work out the way that we desire it to.  Allie took that chance. It may have not been ideal or how many of us would have but she did. I loved when she shrugged her shoulders after taking the suitcases out of the car.  She was like, what the heck do I have to lose at this point. 

Try Vulnerability

The transparency of emotions in this movie was unbelievable.  I mean let’s be real, they held nothing back. Noah was amazing with expressing his feelings to her even though he was not sure of the outcome. Uncertainty, fear and experiences will drive our inability to follow our heart, express ourselves, and simply be who we are.  I loved the raw emotion. 

Who determines closure?

Often times we get hung up on closure in relationships, deaths, friendships etc. This happens when things end abruptly or if they do not end the way that we feel they should end. When it comes to closure, it is determined by the person seeking it. At times individuals are not capable of providing closure to you when you feel as though they should.  So how do you manage that expectation?  Determine for yourself what closure looks like. You cannot allow your emotions to be held hostage while you are waiting on something that may never happen. Trust yourself. You may have to provide your own closure. 

Yes, two people who love someone care share a space

Now this was so refreshing to see. I will admit, I was amazed at how the two ladies in Noah’s life was able to share a common space together in a respectful way and both still love the same man dearly.  Yes, this is possible. There is no need to be at odds. The respect amongst the ladies was breathtaking. It’s okay to love someone from your past. You may never end up with that person and you two may have different lives, but you can still love them and you don’t have to feel guilty about it. 

Singing…Buy Me Lovvveeee, money Can’t Buy Me Love 

I loved that song and I think this was made clear in the movie. Money does not buy happiness. Her parents were dead set on her being with someone for security and her mom had to confess that she was once where her daughter currently is. While stability and security are why we work daily, that Chanel bag or Rolex may not give her or him butterflies.  Those butterflies, boat rides, games and surprises sustain the relationship in the long run.  It’s the small stuff people. 

Last but not least, The writing in this movie moved me more than anything. Writing letters was the way we did things in the 80s, 90s and early 2000’s for some. Receiving a letter from your crush or your guy between classes was the best thing ever.  You could read how they felt over and over again, even when you guys were at odds. There is something about the value of a pin and paper. Its meaningful. Its thoughtful.  We have gotten away from old school writing. I loved that he wrote her daily for 1 year. Wow, can you imagine receiving a love letter from your current significant other every single day. How romantic.  

Overall the movie was great. It screamed YOLO! YOLO! YOLO! It definitely made me want the fantasy. It gave me hope that the guy or girl of your dreams is out there and just because they are out there and may end up being yours; doesn’t mean that it will be easy.  Either way you have to work for it.  You either work to follow your heart or you work to guard it.  Which one have you chosen or will choose?

8 thoughts on “What I learned from The Notebook

  1. I have seen this movie about 5 times, however after reading your insightful musings I want to watch it again. You continue to wow me cousin!

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  2. Personally the notebook always creeped me out. But what you took away from it’s very pretty- and very solid life advice.

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      1. I don’t know, honestly. The movie’s just always made me hella uncomfortable lol. Could never figure out why!

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